Saturday, March 19, 2011

March 19, 2011 Dear Son,



I woke at 3:00 A.M.  and in my mind was this,

I have survived…


Being slapped, pushed and beaten
Being humiliated and bullied
Being sexually abused
A Truly Evil Man
My two brother’s pain
My mother’s pain
Being chased by a car in an orange grove
Self doubt, self pity and self hatred
Being lied to
Being cheated on
Being a mother
My drug and alcohol abuse
Inappropriate relationships/promiscuous behavior
Cigarettes
Two surgeries
My apartment burning down
Being fired
Suicidal depression
A car accident in Mexico
Stealing, lying and cheating
Many hours of intense therapy
My brother’s death
My grandmother’s death
My dad’s death
My mentor’s death
My husband’s death
  
I have survived in spite of ~not because of~
  I have scars;
I still struggle with using foods to comfort
I have a hard time using just One of anything
I lie sometimes
Ad infinitum…

I am not perfect I don’t know who is, Everyone you meet has a story, Everyone!  Some have survived, some have survived and thrived and some did not survive at all…
I dug in deep, started healing and stopped blaming… 


1 comment:

  1. and whenever i get the opportunity to visit the "Tree of Who You Are"...I am blessed by a beautiful woman who has not only survived, but has sent down strong roots to thrive, and in doing so graced other lives... i am one of the fortunate ones who has sat beneath the shade of your kind goodness. thank you with love, xok.

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